1 7 2013

don't know the artist: inside the building on university and center, by the black sheep cafe

coleman galleries

january 2013 art stroll

muse music display by trevor christensen. check him out at trevorchristensen.com 

also at muse music. unknown artist. beautiful work though.

unknown artist

steven waggoner. check him out at stevenwaggoner.com

This one’s called “Things No One Tells You” and it’s dedicated to the piles of folded clothes sitting on the floor in the basement. They’re there because I’m moving for the fourth time in six months and starting to wonder what’s wrong with my brain. Mostly, I’m just scared for life, I guess. In high school it was fine and during the summer it was fine but now I can’t remember for the life of me why I chose a college that doesn’t offer my major, or why I signed a contract for a $420 apartment when my last day at Starbuck’s is on Sunday. These things aren’t making sense to me and it’s getting a little hard to breathe in here.

Mainly, because I don’t want to be a loser and I’m scared driving an hour for school is going to make me crazy and I will never be able to hang out with Jake Cooper and I’ll get fat from eating all the food at my mom’s house and I’ll fail my classes and I won’t be able to start my BSW until winter 2013 and that throws my whole plan off. Also, I’m scared life isn’t going to work out and I’m going to make more mistakes and maybe not even graduate and then I’ll be one of those girls who laughs at their past dreams like they were pretentious. 

I don’t feel pretentious and I don’t think a master’s degree is too much to ask.

Maybe it is though, and maybe my art is weird and I do need to go to more college activities, because maybe I am living my entire life wrong and I need to stop watching horror movies and spending my time dreaming about the future. Maybe I should start listening to Bruno Mars and going to EDP dance parties and wearing jeans. I mean, that’s all I’m hearing from most people lately anyways. “Emily you should...” but, I don’t want to do any of that. Ok, world? Can I just spend my time listening to Dashboard and organizing my room? I’ll miss all the sporting events and the majority of important school extracurricular activities, but Prayer of the Refugee is so much more appealing.

Probably I need to cry right now, but all the training hasn’t worn off, so I’ll just zone out while doing every day tasks and hope it ends soon. And life will turn out ok, because that’s what everyone always says and they wouldn’t say that if it weren’t true.

XOXO

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