Monday, September 19, 2011

Sometimes, they don't call. 

So, you eat an ice cream bar for the second time in four years and decide they are better than you give them credit for.

So, you text that boy who accidentally spit in your face while you were dancing and then turned all red.

So, you think about how all you want to do is have lunch with Tony Shafrazi and talk about Riding With Death.

So, you spin your chair repeatedly, because that little thought of not being able to move one day scares you so much you feel the need to get as much movement in as possible.

So, you start to hate girls, because they always ditch you for the boy they are crushing on at the moment, but then drag you around like a puppy once their dumped.

So, you think about the word "in" and how it means a big lifetime change will be happening, but still doubt that the change will actually take place.

And then they do call, right when you're typing all of this. And it makes you feel like maybe there is hope to humanity after all. Maybe, The Devil doesn't really have as much control as he thinks he does. 

Then, you close your eyes and think back to the dream you had last night. The one where Adam was kneeling on the ground and your mother was talking about cooked chicken. The one where Alena made you stick your hand in a barrel of guts, so you could paint your stomach with blood and blend in with the rest of the crowd. The one where you were in a Wal-Mart that really wasn't a Wal-Mart. The one that seemed like it didn't make sense and was completely random, but at the same time had some sort of underlying message that plagued your thoughts all day.

And after all that, you realize that every Cameron you have ever met has been the most enjoyable person, and that's amazing because there are a lot of not so enjoyable people in the world.

Thankfully, none of them are named Cameron.

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